What is Mental Health
Social Anxiety
The problem of social anxiety is caused by a significant difference between how you think you are and how you perceive others think you should be.
Read MoreIntrospection Part 12, Ideals for self-discovery
Some time ago, before writing the last couple of Blog posts on introspection, I had decided that there would be exactly twelve posts in this series. Twelve is such a nice, complete number. There are twelve months in a year. In the Bible, there are the twelve tribes of Israel and Twelve Apostles (okay, now…
Read MoreIntrospection Part 8, Self-awareness and being
“Skynet… becomes self-aware at 2:14 a.m. Eastern time, August 29th.” From the Movie, Terminator II, 1991 I was on a bus at the age of 14, headed toward work. I was looking down at my hands. I was probably bored, and maybe high on something. I started to move my fingers, watching my…
Read MoreIntrospection Part 3, Why do we avoid our inner lives
I hope I made a convincing case in Part 2 of this discussion on introspection—that exploring your inner life has some very tangible (and intrinsic) benefits, including predictability and flexibility (in how you interact with others). I hope I also made it clear that, without introspection, there is really no way for a person to…
Read MoreIntrospection Part 2, the value of self-discovery
Every once in a while I run into a person who tells me they think introspection and self-awareness are a waste of time. I have even on occasion been told that introspection encourages negative feelings about ourselves, by causing us to dwell on difficult issues. I am almost universally so surprised by these ways of…
Read MoreDefining Morality
In a recent blog post I discussed the process of “Defiant Morality” leaving for another blog the related process of “Defining Morality,” which will be the topic of this blog post. Defining Morality might be described as the opposite side of the spectrum from Defiant Morality. Defining Morality is this: “in any given situation, do…
Read MoreDefiant Morality
I have for some time been considering how to approach more directly my thoughts on morality—on what is “good” and “bad” when it comes to human decisions, including their behavior, beliefs, attitudes, and judgments. I have wanted to write about this topic directly, but have hesitated. The problem has been that is in my nature…
Read MorePride
People fear pride, which is weird, and a bummer. Pride is good. It even seems a little sad when someone tells me they fear letting themselves feel pride. Pride is simply a way of telling ourselves we have done something worth doing, and maybe we have even done it well. So why do we fear…
Read MoreThe Location of Morality
I am in the mood to offer a very ambitious thought and then try to explain it, knowing the thought is far too broad and complex to have any hope of an adequate explanation in just a few pages. It is likely that the subject will occupy my thoughts to some degree for the rest…
Read MoreThe Power of Tenacity
A search for the definition of the word “tenacity” first brings up “stubbornness.” It works for a starter—except we think of stubborn as a mostly negative trait and I want to write about the positive aspect of tenacity. Sometimes, though, there is also strength in stubbornness. While on a walk a few years ago with…
Read MoreTherapy Part 1, what is therapy
What is therapy? As a therapist, I continually ask myself basic questions about therapy. What is “therapy?” When does therapy work? How do I know it is working? What is the ultimate point of therapy? Am I doing all the things I should be doing to help make the process as valuable and beneficial to…
Read MoreHow important is your past in therapy?
Clients are often (justifiably) concerned about getting stuck or dwelling on their past for months or years as part of the therapy process. Sometimes clients have a concern that therapy might encourage them to rely on their past as “an excuse” for whatever their issues might be in their current lives (“I can’t get my…
Read MoreFeelings, good and bad, make your choice
One of the most important things I think I do as a therapist is to remind clients that their feelings are almost never either all “good” or all “bad.” When I discuss feelings with clients, I do not merely ask, “how does that make you feel.” I ask, “what does that feeling tell you?” “What…
Read MoreA Tribute to Abraham Lincoln
With Lincoln’s birthday coming up, I want to thank him for his great influence on me, my life, and my therapeutic philosophy. It might be a bit of a cliché or just plain obvious to be a big fan of Abraham Lincoln. I mean, who isn’t, right? Hating Abraham Lincoln would be like hating cute…
Read MoreDepression and Anxiety: Flip sides of the same coin, Part 2
In part 1 of this series of blogs on the relationship between depression and anxiety, I discuss how they are often related by their both being a response to a difficult task or issue. In Part 2, I describe how depression and anxiety become such problems when dealing with difficult tasks or issues. Finally, in…
Read MoreWhat is “Mental Health?” Part II
In my first installment on this topic, I described the current model of “mental illness,” which seems to be the dominant focus of the mental healthcare profession. Rather than focusing on what constitutes a “healthy” mental state, the medical model and insurance driven services have led the mental health profession to identify “what is wrong”…
Read MoreAuthenticity
“Authenticity” has become a frequently cited goal in discussions between therapists and other healers. I am often confused by what other practitioners mean when they talk about wanting to “be authentic.” This is just not obvious to me. So, I want to take a crack at explaining what it means to me for “me” to…
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