Posts Tagged ‘family’
Introspection Part 7, Intersubjectivity
There’s this scene in the movie The Elephant Man that was transformative for me. I saw the movie in my late teens. In the movie, the main guy has a disease which disfigures his whole body, including his face. In this particular scene, he is running from reporters. I think he’s in a hospital. At…
Read MoreRelationship Communication Styles
Communication Styles The way we communicate with each other is usually based on our perceptions of a situation that tell us how we need to express ourselves to get what we want from that situation. Communication “styles” (or approaches) can be broken down into four categories: “passive,” “assertive,” “passive-aggressive,” and “aggressive.” You can see from…
Read MoreJudgments
We all say we don’t like to be judged by others, and yet, let’s face it, we all judge others. Does this make us hypocrites? Not necessarily. It depends on what you judge and how you use judgments. There are a couple of different ways to judge and to be judged. There are also different…
Read MoreResponsibility and blame
Desire for personal growth, and the kind of change that comes with it, is usually driven by a recognition that things as they are now are somehow unsatisfactory, problematic, or just more difficult than we want them to be. Somewhere there is a situation that needs changing, a problem to be resolved, a challenge to…
Read MoreA thought for the Holidays, let others be who they are
Let’s say you find a sibling, an in-law or some other family member you have in the past found particularly irritating; maybe you disagree with their values, politics, religion, or their lack of filters (e.g. when they drink). Now let’s say you only see them once or a few times a year, like during the…
Read MoreTherapy with couples, Part 2, the process
As a Marriage and Family Therapist, it probably comes as no surprise that a significant portion of clients are couples who want to resolve issues in their relationships. Although the kinds of issues that couples bring to therapy vary greatly, there are certain common elements to the process of working with couples that are quite…
Read MoreTherapy with couples, deciding on the structure and format
In this first of a two-part discussion of therapy with couples, I will explain some of the options for arranging the structure of the couples therapy. The second part of the discussion will delve into the process of working with couples in therapy. I will explore some thoughts about why couples therapy works and sometimes…
Read MoreTherapy, Part 3, the process of therapy (with me)
The process of therapy is different for every client. All clients have different needs, goals, issues, personalities, levels of development, self-awareness and expectations. It is important for me to cater my approach and processes in therapy to the individual needs of all unique clients. No one approach fits everyone. At the same time, there are…
Read MoreOur Christmas Miracle
This is a story of a Christmas Miracle about our precious little dog, Julian. For those of you who do not celebrate Christmas, either because it is not consistent with your culture or belief system, or because you for other reasons simply choose not to participate in this holiday, please bear with me. I actually…
Read MoreA Theme for the Holidays: Stay frosty, stay flexible
Last year, I wrote my first blog about the holiday season, in which I gave my take on how we can best address whatever might come up for us when we spend time with our family over the Holidays. I feel this need to say something again this holiday season, maybe as a kind of…
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